Tis the season, my favorite season, and truth be told I’ve been living it up since October. Maybe even September. But not like I used to think of living it up at Christmastime. In this season of my life, this blessed, busy, overwhelming, wonderful season of my life, cramming in more stuff is not an option. It’s not even appealing. So we’ve been celebrating, waiting, counting down the days while living them.

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We’ve been wearing Santa hats, and sleeping under twinkle lights.

We’ve been wearing matching jammies (just the kids, I swear)

We’ve been watching the Polar Express every night, and having a second cookie, and singing loud for all to hear.

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We’ve talked about having birthday cake for Jesus, and Sam ‘sang’ in his first school Christmas program this week.

We are also getting ready for him to turn 3. #Samturnsthree #SamsFrozenThirdBirthday #forreal

We’ve played with the characters from a Charlie Brown Christmas, telling their sweet story via flannelgraph and little figurines.

Peanuts Collage

The house is a mess and hardly decorated. The tree is up and three of the four stockings are hung on the mantle with care, but that’s it. We’ve been purging our ‘stuff’ and living in the things are worse before they’re better state for weeks, which is making my environment and my insides all chaotic. I recently quit one job and started another (details on that soon). Our childcare situation is changing in a few weeks. My sons birthday and Christmas are both inside of ten days, and we’re having houseguests, and chaos abounds.

But there is a stillness to this season, a peace that passes understanding, a deep sense of wonder in my soul. We’ve been making memories with our kids, and there’s a terrified joy in suddenly figuring out that I am responsible for the memories my babies will carry with them all of their days.

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What do I want them to remember?

  • Having a temper tantrum because the ‘stuff’ in my house is making the walls close in tight, or shoving some ‘stuff’ over to have snuggles on the couch?
  • Crabbily making a hasty meal, or happily making a frozen lasagna one night and having a treat afterwards?
  • Sharing a cute photo on Instagram right in the moment, or being with them right in the moment?

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I want to claim that stillness and share it with my kids. I want to make the right choices most of the time and give them the very best I can offer at Christmastime. I want to worry later, and have fun with them now. I want to burn the candle at both ends for just a little while, giving extremely of myself for a short time so that we all have clean laundry but also movie night without interruption. I want to take moments for myself and allow my kids the joy of entertaining themselves for a short while, because mama deserves Christmas memories too.

These are the ways we’re living it up this Christmas. More sugar, less stress, more books, less TV, more late nights, less sleep (for a while!), more laughter, less mommy tantrums, more sparkle, less white space, more ornaments in clumped together glory, less control, more love. It’s not how this season has always looked for me, but it’s shaping up to be the best one yet.

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